Ahoy maties! I’m glad to be of arr-ssistance. Please stay on the line til… oh wait. You arrrr alrrready talking to a customer rep-arr-sentative. That’s me. Er. Yer having problems with yer Internet?

Have yer tried unplugging and reconnecting yer modem? Arr. Yar, that’s kinda arr-bitr-arr-y. Is yer phone using an ARR-m process-arr?

Ok we’ll stop now. S-arrrrr-y.

PS: This may help explain things a little. Sort of. Not really. Hm.